LETTER #2: A wounded body

Dear Friend,

When we don’t have the words to describe pain, we often use pictures.  I’ve heard so many as I’ve talked with others who have walked this road. I’m not sure any do justice to the full horror, but a few stick out to me.  

A friend told me that it was like a truck load of manure backed into the driveway, dumped it all and left. The only way to get rid of the mess was to eat each bite with a teaspoon until it was all gone. Another friend said she was on a non-stop roller coaster and a merry go round at the same time. Another was in the dark going through fragments of film clips of her life with memories coming back in crushing frequency while she unsuccessfully tried to put the film fragments back together. My own mental image was being out in the ocean and with each wave, I was held down, gagging and violently scraping my head on the ocean floor while I desperately tried to reach the surface so I could catch my breath. Then it would start all over again. Or being hit by an 18 wheeler ~ lying there ~ while the truck backed up and rolled over me again and again.

I’m sure you understand and have your own pictures. The universal feeling of sexual betrayal ~ your spouse secretly forming a life with someone else while you think you are living a life together ~ holds a level of devastation that shakes the foundation of who you are and the world you thought you were building.

Understandably, our bodies will react to that pain. Our nervous system will be on a state of high alert. We truly have been in a 

head on collision. We’ve broken every bone in our body. We’re going to be in the emergency room and then ICU and then triage and then rehab before we get back home to “normal” life. It will take more than time to heal. It will take intervention. It will take good people surrounding us. It will take God’s healing of our broken hearts. 

Take heart, sister ~ in due time. 

From your Sister on the journey

“Find rest in God alone. Your hope comes from Him.” Psalm 62:5